“The best ghost hunting tool is you.”

Rich in history and culture, cemeteries afford fascinating glimpses into the past. The Sacramento Historic City Cemetery offers free walking tours covering a variety of themes, from Victorian funeral customs and Gold Rush Era history to rose classification. They also conduct Lantern Tours around Halloween. Ghost stories, told as stories, have folkloric value.

A cemetery tour I attended recently went beyond the history and ghost stories. Unfortunately, it went beyond the tasteful.

This is a project in process, so I’m not naming names just yet…

The organizers demand that attendees sign a “Condition of Purchase” that includes the following disclaimer:

By purchasing your Haunted --- Cemetery Tour Ticket(s) you and other individual(s) you are purchasing ticket(s) for, you and they realize that there are dangers inherent in investigating the paranormal, and other related activities, and that mortal or serious personal/spiritual/mental injuries and property damage, including (but not limited to) physical effort, may occur from your participation in such activities.

The tour commenced with a display of the group’s collection of ghost hunting equipment, including EMF readers, KII meters, cameras and the latest in ghost hunting technology – flashlights. Ask the flashlight questions and it goes on and off in response (or because there’s a bad connection). And listen to your body when you

feel the hairs on your arms stand on end, “The best ghost hunting tool is you.”

Then there was a presentation of their “evidence” - videos of “shadow people” and recordings of Electronic Voice Phenomena (including a “spirit” supposedly murmuring “slut”, and other alleged voices of the dead mouthing expletives).

Had the tour purported to be historical it still would have been inadequate. One of the six guides read from prompt cards and none could answer questions. However, they had many anecdotes; “We collected EVPs from this crypt!” and “We could smell the scent of lavender near this grave!”

The tour was disrespectful to the families of the deceased and left the cemetery open to vandalism. Attendees roamed the grounds, touching statues, tombs and mementos, walking across graves, filming and taking photos. One man ran about collecting EVPs, barking “Are you in here with me?” into the morgue, and demanding of a tombstone, “Were you murdered?”

Unsurprisingly, there weren’t any restrooms in the cemetery. At a loss for other options, an organizer suggested grudgingly; ‘this shouldn’t be a problem for the guys, they can just go outside, but don’t go on the graves.’

The tour cost $25 and reputedly, all proceeds go to the cemetery’s Benevolent Society. After six months of tours, they still haven’t received these funds.

This investigation continues…

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